My daughter came into my room today and said sorry mom but i unwrapped the christmas present early and i broke my new toy. I walked to see which toy see broke and i realized it was the vibrator my husband bought for me FWM

I was whacking it to some animal porn and my mom walked in and said we are getting a new dog. Then she saw me and was like ohhh never mind maybe we will just buy u a hooker FWM FWM

My Bf comes back after seeing his dad he hasn't talked to for years. So i figured id surprise him. he was sleeping on the couch. Right when he starts to cum someone comes out of the bedroom IT WAS MY B/F. He walks to the bathroom and doesn't even see me."dad says ur a good girl" he tells me today :( FWM

6 months ago I got engaged,then we bought a house. I got a raise so we put a down payment on a new car. Out of nowhere I get sick it lasted for 2 weeks so I decided to go to the hospital.only to find out I'm stage 3 of leukemia I start chemo in 2 days. they said i might not make it I'm only 26. FWM

I just got out of jail September 5th 2008 i have only been out for about for about 5 months and tomorrow i have to turn my self in at 8:30am FWM

my lanuage arts teacher made me sit next to this girl i absoulutly hate 6 times in a row. FWM

My homegirl was hanging out in my bedroom while I was taking a shower. I come out the shower and see her holding windex and paper towels. She said she cleaned up the ashes, and baby powder on my desk. It wasn't baby powder. She windexed $120 worth of coke FWM

I was sitting with my neighbor & her girlfriend they were drunk. My neighbor starts feeling nauseous, so I help her lean forward to throw up, nothing comes out, so I relax thinking it has passed, The minute she leans all the way back out of nowhere with out warning she starts projectile hurling all over her self and anything with in 2 feet in all directions, including me & my $950 Gucci uptowns FWM

Today I tried to hit on this girl, my friend must have said something rude, she got pissed and kicked my tail light and it broke . Its a BMW. I chased her into a store to tell her she needs to pay for it. She threw a beer bottle at me,then ran. hurt so much I started crying. FWM

After contemplating suicide for quite some time, hysterically crying I pop a whole bottle of tylenol hoping I would OD. I then go and tell my family what I did, & said I can't wait for it to kick in, so I can drop dead right in front of them. Their response? Their laughter was louder than my cries FWM

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